Go for it.

Hubby really made me think after I went through some of my issues with him. He never pretends to be nice - he just says what he thinks - even if it seems harsh at first.

He told me I overthink and if I really want something, I just have to do it. If I keep thinking too much and being all unsure, I either don't have the drive or don't deserve it. He said I can either accept that I'm weak and accept that I won't ever get to the top of my game, because of being weak, or I can just be ruthless and get off my arse and go for it.

He's so right. If I think too much and don't just strive, I don't deserve to be the best. The really high achievers push and push and don't worry about all the crap I worry about - including having to feel important and having people make me feel certain ways - it's pathetic.

You know, these last few days I've really had a think about who cares about me.

I have friends, and plenty of people like me, but few are truly there for me - no matter what.

I shouldn't waste my thoughts on those who like me but who aren't there for me. It just hurts me when I feel they're all hot and cold and when they sometimes are wonderful and sometimes don't seem to care. I can't take that anymore.

I know who the special ones are - the ones who truly care. I will care for them and not let the others get anywhere near me.

So - I am no longer under anyone's spell. I give as much as I care to. I love as much as I need to. I am loyal and grateful as much as I should be.